For Sinners Only: Changing Your Life One Day At A Time — March 1

Image                There are those moments when I think about sinning. There are those moments when I decide that I may choose to sin. These moments are not attractive, but they are also not failures.

It was not long ago when I had no choice at all. Sin was a compulsion. When sin was a compulsion, I just sinned without thought, without choice. It was not something I decided to do, but something that happened to me. In spite of my best efforts not to, as soon as the desire, or temptation, or lure came along, I immediately gave into it. As Saint Paul says: “I do not understand what I do; for I don’t do what I would like to do, but instead I do what I hate. So I am not really the one who does this thing; rather it is the sin that lives in me”(Rom. 7:15,17).

Oftentimes, in moments of boredom, I would seek out sin so that it would entice me. In those moments sin was not acting upon me, but I chased after it to act upon it, I was like Saint Augustine who wrote in his Confessions: “I became evil for no reason. I had no motive for my wickedness except wickedness itself. It was foul, and I loved it. I loved the self-destruction, I loved my fall, not the object for which I had fallen but my fall itself. My depraved soul leaped down from your firmament to ruin. I was seeking not to gain anything by shameful means, but shame for its own sake.

But today, there is a choice. I do not compulsively sin, neither do I compulsively chase after sin in times of boredom, or as a means of quick pleasure in stressful times. The fact that I still have moments in which I think about sinning, or even moments when I choose to sin simply means that I am human. The fact that it is a choice demonstrates that I am not the same person I used to be.

Since I am not that person anymore, I do not have to choose to be that person I used to be. So in those moments when I think about sinning I can say to myself: “Do not reach out and take back that problem again. You have given it to God, so that even though you have a choice, it is not your choice to make.” Since I have decided to let God handle my sin problem for me, I find that I rarely sin, even in those moments when I choose to sin. For some reason, it just never seems to happen.

QUESTION FOR THE DAY:
Have I decided to take my sin problem back into my own hands?

PRAYER:
Thank you, Lord, for taking care of my sin problem for me. Remind me ever so gently that my sin is in your hands and that sinning is not a choice I have to make today. Let your will be done in me and though me. Amen.

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